While Sony has made several blunders in the current gen console war one of the biggest was allowing Call of Duty 4 to go multi-platform. The game has become such a runaway success that it could have single-handedly changed the face of the war as we know it. Perhaps equally as big was allowing Grand Theft Auto 4 to go multi-platform. Although the game sold about 45/55%  on the PS3 and Xbox 360 respectively, there are rumblings that the next installment in the GTA series may become a Playstation exclusive by default.

Wait, what the hell are you talking about?

As has been documented, Rockstar was notably unhappy with the limitations of the DVD-9 format on the Xbox 360 and how it affected GTA 4. As we’ve all seen though, both versions of the game are practically the same. The rumblings this time around though are seem to be much more boisterous. Early rumours have Rockstar threatening to not release GTA5 on the Xbox, but that begs the question: Why? Why sacrifice all the money you would undoubtedly make by only creating the game for one console?

Although one can never account for backroom dealings and shattered business relationships, there is really only one answer.

They want their game to be good.

Was GTA4 lacking on the Xbox 360? Of course not. It was Game of the Year. It recieved rave reviews across the board. But could it have been better? WOULD it have been better if it had only been released for a single console? Of course. This applies to any game released on any console exclusively though. What makes this time around special is that the GTA developers may in fact be willing to part with the extra revenue in order to better perfect their craft which seems absolutely ludicrous in our current economic standings. It is not to say that Rockstar would be the first group to sacrifice sales for art. It is however to say that doing so now could prove to be an earth shaking event that has an indelible effect on how Video Games are made.

In a world driven by profit, and in an industry not well renowned for being bohemian, this kind of move would be as surprising as it would be dramatic. A triple-A developer openly supporting both their own art and A specific console could sway other third party developers to do the same. It would also give other developers a comfortable “out” to abandon a platform they wouldn’t want to develop on for fear of not returning enough profit. After all, in such hard economic times, it’s surprising that more companies aren’t already doing this and attributing it towards a need for the betterment of the game as opposed to monetary restrictions. Keep in mind as well, if Halo 3, Gears of War and Metal Gear Solid 4 have shown us anything, exclusive games can still sell ridiculously well regardless of being exclusive.

That being said, the whole “pursuing art” argument could simply be an excuse from Rockstar after the fact. Rockstar has a contractual obligation to produce 3 exclusive games for the PS3 as reported by the Hiphopgamer (through an interview with an industry insider) and other sources. We know one of these games is Agent, another one of these games may supposedly be the somewhat forgotten L.A. Noire, a sandbox game set in the 1930’s. GTA 5 would probably be not all that different than 4 regardless of development time and console exclusivity, and if L.A. Noire is factored in, that would mean all of the three promised exclusives would be off the table.

If one wanted to be even more pessimistic, this could be seen as also be seen as a moving away from Microsoft has the prime conduit for producing games. Take-Two openly denied Microsoft’s exclusivity bid for Bioshock 2 while EA is now releasing Dead Rising 2 on the PS3. Capcom has also recently confirmed a concurrent release of Lost Planet 2. Along with a slew of exclusives for the PS3, this could seem very dramatic, but there are still a lot of positives for the Xbox.

Don't worry cousin, beeg American teetee's will probably come to all platforms (minus Wii)

Even though EA has clearly made Dead Rising 2 multi-platform, the status of Mass Effect is still up in the air. Microsoft also has Epic, Bethesda and VALVe onboard as companies who are much more enamored with Microsoft than they are with Sony. And of course, staying with the pessimism, Microsoft has one very, very big asset. A seemingly inexhaustible amount of money. Everyone has their price, and a company as rich as Microsoft can probably name yours.

Microsoft made Rockstar rich. Rockstar took at least 30% of every sale from the GTA4 expansion pack, along with the millions of dollars they recieved from the exclusivity deal itself. Ultimately, beyond all of this industry wheeling and dealing as well as speculation, it just doesn’t seem like anyone can resist the siren song of the greenback. Perhaps that’s why I find it so interesting that the such a bohemian notion can be expressed by Rockstar. Even with evidence showing that it could be legitimate and genuine (undoubtedly in the exclusivity of Agent), I’m still not convinced that such dedication to art can even exist in our modern day industry. If it does come to pass though. it might just spur on the innovation and advancement in the industry that some believe is lacking. And if this kind of innovation can occur when times are tough, imagine how sweet it could be in times of plenty.

Nintendo broke away from competition with Sony and, new arrival, Microsoft with what some call the “Blue Ocean” business strategy. The Blue Ocean strategy is the metaphor of leaving a “red ocean” (one dyed by the blood of competition) for unclaimed waters filled with the potential for creating new demand. From a business stand point this brave (or stupid) move has paid off and now Xbox 360 and Playstation 3 are competing for second place.

Nintendo managed to succeed because they did something more than incrementally improve and repurpose old features. Yes, Gentle Reader, I’m talking about the “I” word, innovation. It’s debatable if the Wii controller is a true innovation as some gamers will still belittle it and mock it, but from a business standpoint it’s a successful change that’s brought in tremendous profit. Nintendo is as guilty as everyone else of giving us sequels by the truck load, most games in each series offer something new every one or two games. In truth, sequels are not really a bad thing as long as they are different enough that it stands on its own or adds to the previous experience.

This is the potential folly faced by Microsoft and Sony. If both companies continue to try and outdo the other, this means they have to rely on the other to show them where it is they are going. As mentioned before, it’s a tradition in the game industry to play copy cat with your opponents and then sell what they made for a lower price or with something more appealing attached. The game Sony and Microsoft are playing is the equivalent of trying to race someone you’re following to an unknown finish line.

If the two titans do not exercise some real creative muscle and insight, they run the risk of choking their audiences’ current interest. History has shown that strokes of genius like Katamari Damacy are not that common and while they may be risky or appear too weird, it’s that their quirkiness that aid to its success. The first GTA games offered sandbox gameplay, but GTA 3 took the top down world and made it more accessible by giving the player more dimensions to see everything. This reinvention (or innovation) has made the name Grand Theft Auto globally known.

Rehashed games, or those that don’t provide much of a new gaming experience, can poison a series or genre. If the games they make for the “core” gamer are not more than uninventive sequels the interest will dissolve and the audience will vanish or develop new preferences. The market has become swamped with First Person Shooters and while some may feel that’s not bad, it clearly demonstrates that developers are vying for the attention of a certain niche while alienating possibilities. As mentioned before, even if Nintendo did not stir up this casual boom, the publishers seemed to become more focused on producing games they KNOW will sell then those that can expand the market.

When we consider that the Xbox 360 has introduced its Mii-like “Avatars” and has begun promoting its “family friendly games” and that the Playstation 3 has its “six axis” controller and demonstrated a recent swelling of fresh but casual Playstation Store games their actions foreshadow that the duo are once again trying to outdo the other as they look for the path Nintendo made. Sony and Microsoft could just stick with the audience that has carried them to their current success, but like I proposed in part 1, only a fool (or altruistic gamer) would turn down the easy money casual games bring in.

I’d expect the next Microsoft console to utilize some sort of Wii remote like peripheral and the Playstation 3 to get it’s own version of the Wii remote. If Microsoft wishes to make the most money possible, their Wii remote copy will be a peripheral rather than a brand new system.

You might think “The End is Nigh” if you’re a core gamer that detests those happy, care free casual gamers. In the event that Sony and Microsoft act like a business and chase the money, a core gamer’s won’t be lost in a changing industry if the new audience leans how to discern between crap games and software worth its price tag. If all else fails there’s always indie games.

So as of now, these are the ominous black clouds that loom over the game industry. Nintendo is getting flogged with junk casual games and Xbox 360 and Playstation 3 run the risk of tiring their comparatively small (compared to the number of casuals) core audience with incremental improvements of current software.

During the Great Depression, American movie theaters saw steady business as the consumer hungered for an escape from the troubled economy. In today’s global economic recession, it seems that people still want that escape and video games are the medium that provide it even better than a mere 2 hour movie for 20 some dollars (if you get popcorn and a drink.) The road that lies before the game industry is not likely to disappear, no matter how cluttered it becomes with obstacles. That way ahead may be uncertain, but it is not lost when there are companies that will forge new paths and people that pine for the experience.

Presenting…

…The Top Five Signs That a DLC Should Have Just Been Free

Brought to you by Fedora Man

Well it finally April and you have to love how easy it is to open an article with the lines “so it’s finally whatever month we’re in right now”. It’s time for the next step in my great journey to earn money through a video game blog. Now I know you might be wondering “I thought you had billions! Were you lying to me?” The answer is of course, no. Stupid. Why would I make something like that up? But the difference between that money and the money I’ll earn on this site is I actually had to do work to earn it, unlike my corporation where I really don’t do any work at all. I can show all my friend “yeah this is the ten dollars I earned THROUGH WORK!” and if they say that they also have a job and have made more money, I’ll pull out my emergency one million dollars that I always keep stashed in my pants and laugh at them, probably while rubbing the money all over myself.

Now I’m sure that everyone reading this right now loves to hear all the stories that end with me rubbing money all over myself (and there are a lot of them) but now is neither the time, nor the place for me to describe my achievements to the world. Mainly because I think that might blow my secret identity and also I don’t think anyone would let me post an article called “The Top Five Ways to Rub Money All Over Yourself Like a Pro”. Instead I’m going to write about some game related phenomena, but only because I have to.

That brings me to my greatest problem: what the hell am I going to write about? There aren’t any games coming out these days (according to me) and writing about one specific past game has been done by everyone and their grandma. At first I was thinking “Heroes of Might and Magic 2, everyone will love to hear about that!” before moving to and idea about specific overrated games. Then one night I was staying up late to try to perfect the insertion of a giant blade into my fedora. Some might call that an oddjob rip off, but those same people might find it hard to speak when, say, a razor-bladed hat cuts their entire mouth off. Anyway it was around 6 am that I decided “screw it I’m too tired to think up a new idea” and settled for this one.

Now if you’re like me (and you’re not at all like me) then you too have expressed frustration at some of the worst excuses for DLC (downloadable content if you somehow made it to this point in the article without knowing what that is) ever made. That’s not to say that all DLC is bad and that it should all be free because there are small amounts of DLC that actually seem to have been worked hard on and deserve some sort of monetary reimbursement (the shivering isles for Oblivion is the first thing that comes to mind). Of course for every shivering isles there are hundreds of “screw you, give me all your money” DLCs or as I like to affectionately call them “dog shit”. I’m sure that this isn’t just at 360 problem, it’s probably also a problem with the PS3 but I wouldn’t know now would I? So here are the signs to identify if the dog shit you just bought should have been free.

Number 5: When the DLC is Free Anyway

Example: Call of Duty 4: Variety Map Pack

This is probably the one that isn’t about dog shit (I’m very much hoping the editor doesn’t take offense to that word being used over and over again). This is one of the cases where the DLC might actually be good but in any case it isn’t free even when say, THEY OFFER IT FOR FREE ANYWAY!

Take the above example for instance. The Call of Duty 4 map pack was offered for free via a code in the Game of the Year Edition. The cost of the Game of the Year Edition is exactly the same as the original game so you’d think they’d start offering the map pack for free, right? Wrong (as always)! I’m not exactly sure why they’d do this (other than the obvious “I want more money” approach) yet it seems like around the time they started offering free map packs they’d just go ahead and put it out for free on the marketplace anyway. There’s only one possible explanation: to piss off hat-based crime fighters.

Hell, that reminds me; before I go on I’d like to tell a little story about my experience with these “free” maps. It started like any other day, random death hurricanes mixed with volcanoes and a zombie apocalypse, you know, nothing special. So I decided that I’d go and get Call of Duty 4 because I was in a crime fighting slump (only because I imprisoned all my enemies) and so I decided to blow off some steam by mercilessly killing people on the internet. I picked out my game and brought it to the Gamestop counter where the cashier was like “I’ll give you the game of the year edition, it doesn’t cost anymore and it gives you free maps.” So I was like “sweet free maps, thanks you pimply faced bastard, I’ll be sure not to violently attack you in the future over game prices.” So as I got back home I opened the box… nothing. There was a game and an instruction booklet but that pimply faced sonofabitch lied to me! There wasn’t any map code at all! Now my first reaction was to don my fedora and jacket/trench coat (have to protect my secret identity) and go back to that store to kick all kinds of ass. But I’m a detective too and my detective-like instincts told me that it probably wasn’t that pimply faced bastard’s fault. Using my fedora-shaped super computer I quickly got confirmation that this had happened to many other people as well. In the end, after a brief bout with tech support that should have just began and ended with the word “bastard” I never got my maps. I’m just waiting for the time that they become free, WHICH THEY NEVER WILL!

Number 4: When the Game in Question has a Sequel

Example: Call of Duty 4: Variety Map Pack

Call of Duty again? Really? Well that’s just an example; there are many games like this. Again this isn’t necessarily dog shit but I promise that the next one will be about dog shit, you dog shit enthusiast you. Anyway the reason I claim that the DLC (which may or may not be dog shit to appease all you crazy people) should be free once a sequel comes out because sales probably drop rapidly over time once the sequel hits stores. I’m pretty sure that’s how it works, but don’t take my word on it, it’s not like I know a lot about business (although I do run a multi-billion dollar business in my free time). I don’t think anyone is rushing out to go buy Halo 2, or Mario Party 3 (despite how awesome Mario Party 3 was) so I’ve taken this rule and applied it to damn near any other game. Maybe I can understand not immediately making it free but in the above example Call of Duty 5 (or Call of Duty: whatever the hell they’re calling it these days) has been out for nearly half a year and I doubt that the Call of Duty 4 will have those free maps in another four or five months time. Granted the two were made by different developers but that’s beside the point. Give me the free maps! I demand it!

Number 3: When the DLC Doesn’t Add Anything Special to the Game

Example: Bomberman Live: Bomb-Up Packs

So NOW we’re talking about dog shit. Again I’m hoping the editor doesn’t come to my house and challenge me to a fist fight for using that so often. In any case I could talk about this in depth but the name says it all. The dog shit doesn’t add a whole lot to the game so it should be free on the grounds that I don’t want to pay you to add pretty much nothing to the overall gameplay.

Take my above example… for example (does that even work?) Bomberman’s bomb-up packs should definitely have been free or just included it in the original game. With the pack comes a bunch of gametypes and maps no one online plays anyway (we’re all too busy playing on the good starting maps with the non-stupid game variants to care). It’s like opening a gift on Christmas to get a playstation 2, a gamecube, or an xbox when you already have the better console. But gosh there’s really not more to say about it, maybe I’m complaining too much or maybe… just maybe… you’re not complaining enough.

Number 2: When the DLC is Just a Little Polish to an Otherwise Bland Turd Sandwich

Example: Crackdown (whatever that weapon pack is called)

I wanted to research what the dog shit was called here to retain my journalistic and genius vigilante integrity but I honestly didn’t care. Now let me set one thing straight, whereas Number 3 on the list (the one you just read if you read like a normal human being or super being) was about something that should be free based on the fact that it added little to a good game, this one is about DLC which could be good or bad that adds little to a horrible game. That’s right; I beat the system by having ALMOST identical but still slightly different types of DLC on display. Wooh!

Anyway I’m sure you (yes you, the guy in the red baseball cap) can think of a ton of DLC and games like this, but let’s go with my example because I already took the time to write it down. Now Crackdown wasn’t THAT bad of a game… okay yeah it was. The whole game was GTA or Saints Row with a ton of collection and not a lot of anything else. Shooting civilians was a power-up losing crime too, so there goes all the random slaughtering fun. The goal of the game is to collect orbs and kill a bunch of bad guys. You’re basically like Super Man except with a gun (or a slightly more athletic Fedora Man, with super powers, a gun, and no awesome hat). So after the fun of jumping around rooftops and shooting people wears off about six hours into the game what’s left to do? Well Realtime Worlds (the developers) has the answer in the form of a content pack sure to add a couple more hours of fun to the game. You get a weapon like the harpoon gun which is cool in that you can fire harpoons at people and stick them to cars and buildings and trees and other people. Where was the downside again? Oh right the fact that there’s a fuggin’ price tag associated with it. What the hell?! I paid sixty dollars for your game! There is no way in hell I’m going to spend six to ten dollars more to make your game NOT suck as much. You may think I’m being a little frustrated this time, because if there’s anything Fedora Man is known for its definitely not violent outbursts of vigilante justice. But that’s what happens when you stay up too late and you keep slicing off your fingers with your stupid razor-blade lined hat that STILL DOESN’T WORK!

But hey let’s look on the bright side. I’d like to take this time to get away from all the anger and pessimism and quickly point out Left 4 Dead. It’s a decent game, not too bad, not too good. But it appears that they’re coming out with DLC soon to make the game better. You know what I like the most about it without even having to look up gameplay videos on youtube? The fact that valve decided to not be a bunch of assholes and release the DLC free. So there, at least I tried to make this article slightly happier with a contrast between dog shit and decent DLC, as well as decent business practices in general.

Number 1: When the DLC in Question Sucks

Example: Too many to count

Damn even the example is a little depressing. There’s like a sea of dog shit out there (not literally you creep) and you know a DLC should be free when the DLC itself sucks. Really, this one ties into every other group category. By now you must be wondering “is there some kind of evil video game-themed villain out there causing all the DLC in the world to suck?” Well no, there was once, but he died in 1983 when the video game crash happened. It was weird and sad because the one thing he was trying to destroy was the only thing keeping him alive. Once the games became bad enough the crash happened and he died. It’s tragic, which is why I’m writing a play about it. I’m thinking of starring the lead role to Adam West and maybe get Jackie Chan in there somehow; we’ll have to see how it turns out.

Anyway there’s really not much more to say but hell I have time to kill in between creating my razor-bladed fedora and fighting demons from beyond time and space. So I’ll start with a little known game called Halo 2 (does anyone remember this game?). Halo 2 had four or five map packs, with the last one having two levels “Desolation” and “turd sandwich” or… something like that, I can’t remember (and I refuse to look it up). Anyway both were remakes and both were TERRIBLE. Although I’m not ashamed to own the Halo series, I am deeply ashamed to have put any money down toward this map pack. Turd sandwich was a terrible level and desolation was… also terrible (cut me some slack I’m tired AND I saved the world yesterday, shut up). Look I’ll give you another example: Halo 3. Halo 3 (and I use the halo series because of its general accessibility so people know what I’m talking about) had the “Heroic map pack” which was so bloody awful that I had to think twice before ever purchasing any kind of map pack EVER AGAIN! It was like they had a staff meeting but only three people showed up and they left after five minutes after someone said “but think about the customers” and someone else responded with “screw the customers!”

I’ll give you one more you might not have thought about: gamer pictures. Yeah those things, you actually have to pay for them. I think I’ll leave it at that instead of pointing out the crippling stupidity in paying for tiny pictures rather than picking up a fedora to hide your identity and going out to vigilante the shit out of the gaming industry.

Bioshock, in pieces, was a fantastic game. It included a simple but interesting skill tree, classic FPS mechanics, and creative weapons. It featured a sectoral but open level design. It had interesting and intriguing characters and back story. It’s narrative was well presented. But for all these nice touches, they didn’t mesh. Maybe I’m over thinking it, but I believe being critical of anything exposes why it was so good in the first place. Bioshock does not come together as a single whole or as one work. First of all, it was a lackluster RPG. Some people argue it was never an RPG to begin with, They say it was a Shooter. So why were the guns so arduous to shoot? Why was the game 25 hours? The reason a Shooter lasts at most 13 hours is because shooting for another ten is boring. If it was a Shooter, it was poorly paced. Another problem would be, why did we have free form character building, considering the ‘twist’ at the end? If I was a slave, I would be more concerned with kindly doing what I was asked, not wandering around for ADAM. And if I really was a slave all along, why did I do so much wandering? Now, I don’t know how you played the game, but me, I got into an area and the first thing I did was loot and kill everything I could. I even waited for respawns so I could get more. The only reason I ever progressed in the game was because the loading screen was the last door I hadn’t checked. For a slave, I do a piss poor job.

This was my biggest qualm with the game. They throw this dumb plot twist at you completely out of nowhere, like they were arguing with you, got you to swear and shouted “ha I made you swear!”. You walk through the last door in the area, which get’s blocked off once you do, and Fontaine comes on your comm shouting (in a very bad accent) “You were a slave”. Seriously? I couldn’t tell, I’ve been farming ADAM, I wanted to shoot bees, when did I become your slave? Maybe the RPG/Character Building stuff was too add a bit of irony to the situation. Hey, check out our customizable game experience, but wait! You were a slave all along! Maybe that was the case, but I don’t think so. I think Bioshock was trying to hard to be what people wanted it to be, instead of what IT wanted to be. They wanted to be like System Shock, because people loved System Shock. But they wanted it to be like Halo, because people love Halo. How do we combine the two? Keep the open-ish world and RPG elements, introduce the straightforward gunplay and level progression from Halo, 9.0s here I come! Obviously, and this is true with all products, there were compromises. They needed to sell the game, after all. But the game betrayed it’s own ideas. It’s own design. The game was not that intriguing to me. The only reason I made progress was because I was looking for more ADAM. I wanted to make Big Daddies kick other Big Daddy ass… Eventually I made it to the end, but not because I was being compelled by Fontaine’s nasty voice. Because I was trying to do something for me. Max out my stats.

The ability to choose to kill or let live the Little Sisters also betrayed the concept of the game. Just because Fontaine never said “would you kindly kill her” that doesn’t mean it fits right in. Fact is, giving me a dilemma like that (and so many times) contrasts the fact that I’m supposed to be going forward, following orders. I shouldn’t be stopping to choose to help or unhelp anyone. Why am I given a choice if I am a slave? The irony? On top of all this, the ADAM and plasmid system makes it most obvious. Why is my person being turned into whatever I’d like, at whatever points I’d like if I was just told to go to ______ or to collect ______? Why am I not following orders if I really am a slave? I think all this was poorly delivered. You could argue, “well the type of game they wanted to make wouldn’t guarantee the player followed the tracks we set so you have to take it with a grain of salt. Make a huge bottle, but ultimately come out at one narrow end”. Or you could design the game to play the way the story and characters develop. Linear. Tied to a goal without the choice to do other wise. Narrow paths, blocked exits, obvious directions and markings showing where you need to be. Then, you could unlock everything at the end, make it completely open when you stop taking Fontaine’s orders. That way the gameplay would mirror the design of the narrative.

Let’s look at Half Life 1 and 2. People say the plot of these games are not nearly as good as other people have made them out to be. What people do not realize is that Half Life is not just another shooter with a line stolen from every 1970s sci-fi book. It’s a First Person game. Not just a First Person Shooter, but a First Person game. Want to know why the story is so confusing? Because you don’t know what Breen and the slugs have been talking about, what Alyx and Eli and Kleiner have been up to for the last 10 or so years, what Judith does in secret, or what the Vortigaunts can see. You don’t know because you only have a pair of eyes. No ability to travel outside of your body and magically see what everyone else is talking about. The gameplay mirrored the narrative. It was a first person narrative. You got from the story exactly what Gordon had experienced. The gameplay was linear and the story farfetched because there were holes. You weren’t around to see or find out what happened, because you were in a vent instead of floating behind some Commanding Officer in a plane telling his men to kill everyone in Black Mesa. That’s why you don’t understand why the military is out to kill you. The game was designed superbly, and because Bioshock couldn’t take a hint, Half Life not only remains as one of the only games to do this, but probably the best game that’s done this, and to this day, is groundbreaking.

Now take a look at Shadow Of The Colossus. Everything about SotC was designed to push certain feelings and ellicit certain reactions. Why was the world so big? So you would feel small. Why were the Colossi so colossal? So you would feel helpless. Why was their no music outside of the fights? So you would feel lonely. Why was the colour so monotonous? So you would feel sad. Despite having an open world, there was next to nothing to do besides go to the next colossus. Why was there a never a direct route to getting to them (besides the first)? So you could see how much landscape there was, so you could see how insignificant you are. This game featured 3 story cinematics. The starting, the middle, and the end. Somehow, this game pushed more story, more consistently and more powerfully than any game I can think of before it and after it. Players who weren’t paying attention and who didn’t finish it passed it off as being empty and lacking any story at all. How does that explain the wikipages? The discussion that go on every night on some forum about it’s plot and it’s meaning? The game had a very healthy amount of plot considering dialogue was at a minimum and the only two conversations are between the main character and Dormin, and the shaman and his gaurds. The world and the experience and visuals told the story. Wanders deteriorating through out the game, the doves appearing by Mono, the statues counting down, the ruins strewn about the world, all of it told a story, thousands and thousands of years in the making. SotC is the perfect example of design and focus. Made with a purpose and it achieved so much more then people give it credit.

But for whatever reason, the broken Bioshock is selling millions and topping the rankings. I had fun turning the Big Daddies on eachother, I won’t lie. Hacking sentries was cool. The propaganda was funny. But, like I said earlier, seen in pieces the game is fantastic, but as a whole, it failed. Bioshock looked nice. It was well dressed in it’s novelty world. But deep inside it, where it all began on paper, it’s design failed.

Some people will dismiss it without playing it and those people suck, if you’re going to bash a game, at least try it first. That being said, Halo Wars, believe it or not, is a good game. The missions are interesting, and even challenging, and everything just seems right. Let’s run through some of the strong points.

Strong Points:

• Great Controls/Easily Accessible: Now I want to get this out of the way because as I mentioned before, a RTS is all about the controls and the functions. Though Halo Wars lacks some extra features (hot keys, patrol, etc.), the game has essentially everything to make it accessible. This does involve a select all button which many hardcore RTS fan despise, but I highly doubt hardcore RTS fans are the target market for this game. That is to say that, yes, this game is somewhat easier than the conventional PC RTS, but it is in no means easy on higher difficulties.
• Everything just fits: This applies both to the graphics, music, levels. The units look amazing and very clear, and also match the Halo realm, which I find surprising, add to that visually stunning cutscenes and you’ve got some nice eye candy as battles go on. The music is the same type of orchestrated pieces that you would find in other Halo games, and to be honest it suits the game better than the Halo games. The orchestrated music brings a feeling of a grand scale, the feeling that you’re involved in something epic, and that is what Halo Wars is about.
• Varying Missions: Though there are the usual “go here, destroy base” missions, you’ll find there is often evac/escort missions, specialty type missions, and the occasional dodge the fucking scarab that kills you one hit mission, that thing is a beast to take down on legendary.
• Co-operative Campaign: This was the basis of my co-op article because the game is barrels of fun when you play with a friend. You would expect that things would get confusing and frustrating with two people sharing one base, and you’d be wrong. Yes you share resources, no you are not bound by what another person does (in most cases). What you build is yours to command, though you can also select to transfer units to the other player, and this comes in very, very handy in most cases.
• Unlockables: The skull system returns again in Halo Wars, along with optional objectives, if the skull system works like it did in Halos 1-3, then you could have one hell of a time using all of them on legendary.

Weak Points:

• Units don’t know when the fuck to stay still: This may be a pet peeve but it really annoys me to no end, if I command you to go somewhere, I don’t expect you to be moving in the opposite direction due to one group of grunts being there.
• Human Campaign: This was covered by Gamespot but the fact is you can’t play as the Covenant or the Flood in campaign, it’s a bummer I know, but there may be definitely will be DLC including their campaign. You can play as the Convenant in Skirmish mode though, so if you’re iching for some alien play, head on there.
• Where’s the story: Maybe I’m just slow, but it seems to me that there isn’t a huge story regarding Halo Wars, it seems to just jump into the Halo universe and follow the events of one John Forge, I was expecting a little more out of it in terms of story, that’s all.
• Progression: It seems the game never really confirms itself, even past half way through the game you’re still being introduced to new units that only have a one time use or one mission. I’d prefer the first maybe 5-6 missions was with introducing new units, and the rest was how you play it.

All in all, Halo Wars is an amazing game that has lived up to it’s hype in my eyes (probably because there wasn’t too much hype), and it’s worth a look over from any Xbox 360 owner. It has challenge to offer to the hardcore RTS group while remaining accessible to the newbie RTS folk. If you are planning to buy it, go for the mythic map pack bundle because even if you don’t use it yourself, you can sell it on ebay for about 40 dollars USD.

1: DLC: DLC is not bad in and of itself. DLC is a good way to both add features, fix bugs and continue to provide several different kinds of support to your customer. Games like LittleBigPlanet offer things as big as new levels and new creation tools as well as things as small as costumes. Games like Burnout Paradise offer free cars, levels and modes and for free no less. Not every company is out to rip you off and take your money. HOWEVER, when companies abuse this system, that is complete bull and definitely worth complaining about. Case in point: EA’s “Time is Money” DLC. 5 Dollars to unlock all of the accessories in Skate 2. 5 dollars for a cheat code is unacceptable, don’t buy that or I will come and beat the game for you to save you the money. I could also say the same thing about Capcom, who saw fit to charge 20 dollars for extra costumes that are already included on the disk, but I want the beauty pack so I won’t =/

2: BROWN AND BLOOM SHOOTERS: Team Fortress 2, Resistance 2, The Darkness (ironic, isn’t it), Halo 3, the list goes on. Yes, there is a meta-trend towards more gritty and realistic shooters, no that isn’t a bad thing. If any thing, it is a reaction to all of the arcadey shooters we had before hand or all the uber-hero World War 2 games we had before. Face it, we have trends. Trends create anti-trends. Everyone gets a game they want, everyone wins.

3: Exorbitant Waiting/Development Times: The HD era has increased development times. I won’t deny this. However, there are several mitigating facts not the least of which are tons of sweet games on the PSN or XBLA. Then of course you have the Wii which provides you with an ample amount of ROM’s to pay for, as well as the fact that there are many more quality developers and publishers out there cranking out more games than ever before. You may have to wait a long time for Final Fantasy XIII, but that doesn’t mean there aren’t plenty of other good games to play.

4: Too Many Sandbox Games: Sandboxes are another meta-trend in the gaming industry. Sandboxes suck right? Wrong. If anything, they have gotten better. Games like Grand Theft Auto: San Andreas and Oblivion provided the player colossal worlds with absolutely nothing worth doing in them. Grand Theft Auto IV and Fallout 3 reduced the size of the world (while still keeping it adequately large) and proceeded to actually populate the land with people and things with which you could interact in meaningful ways. An unfortunate bi-product of the sandbox craze is that some games which would probably be better in a linear setting get developed according to a trend rather than its strengths. However, if these developers screw up their games and end up failing? Oh well, move on with life. Yes a good game might be lost in the process, no I don’t give a damn, plenty of other good games out there.

5: THIS GENERATION DOESN’T HAVE GOOD GAMES: Stop being ignorant. If you want to be blind to the fact that there are hundreds of good games out there, be my guest. There may not be the sheer quantity of games, but that also has to do with the fact that this generation has only just started. If this generation sucks that bad, go back to playing SNES, I won’t miss your complaining. Old console games have a lot fewer moving parts in them, which makes a game that capitalizes on them seemingly perfect. Games like Megaman 2 which do everything correctly achieve godlike status, but to compare them to modern day games and say the old ones are fun is simply ridiculous. If anything, modern day games should have more of a penchant for fun. If a game with more moving parts manages to execute them all properly, shouldn’t it be better than old games? Hell, XBLA and the PSN provide us with these sort of games all the time! Good ol’ nostalgia.

I had an Atari. Most of the people playing video games don’t know what that is. I’m not saying my opinion is right because I was there, I’m saying my opinion is right because I don’t have the flaccid penis of nostalgia in my mouth. The last generation gave birth to games that I will never forget. So did the one before that, the one before that and the one before that. This one will be no different. How about instead of all this rage you just go and play the vidya, wouldn’t that be super?

First off, the graphical presentation of the game is a slight step upward from Katamary Damacy, as in, things aren’t made out of legos. The graphics are simple, fun, and very colorful. What do I mean by colorful? It has every single color of the visible spectrum possible and then cranks up the hue and contrast to eleven. But that’s not really a problem as it fits the game perfectly for what it is.

I was a bit disappointed with the soundtrack, as in, there’s only like one song. From the same person who made Katamari Damacy, I was hoping that he would grab a bunch of Japanese musicians like he did last time and create a soundtrack for the game since the Katamari Damacy soundtrack was really good, but I should stop comparing the game with earlier works. For the most part the song is nice and soothing and at times, I really can’t tell when it’s been on a loop, so it fits perfectly with the game. I just wish there was a bit more variety with the music.

The controls are simply as they mainly use the analog sticks, left one to control your head and the right one to control your patoot. To go pretty much where you want, just control one or the other, but to make your Boy stretch, make them go in opposite directions – of course there are other ways to stretch. The second shoulder buttons have multiple functions, which range from resisting, jumping, lifting, and eating/pooping. Eating and pooping? Hell yeah, cause a rampage in the little town by eating everything you see and shoot them out of your butt, or if you break apart from stretching too much you can eat your own bottom as well. The first shoulder buttons control the camera, which can be a bit a tricky at times. All the camera movements are done while holding the first shoulder buttons and using the SIXAXIS to move the camera. Anyone familiar with the SIXAXIS will know that it’s a bit hard to control and it’s no different for this game, but the good news is that it actually works. Like a curve then a plateau, learning the camera might be a bit tricky but you will get use to it.

The game or some would argue it’s just some glorified screensaver, some sort of virtual pet or something of that nature; doesn’t really have any goals, missions, quests, etc. It skips all the menus and propels you into its sandbox of the finest grade, which means you have make your own fun instead of something telling you to have fun.

“What? Screwing around doing nothing? How could that possibly be fun?”

Truly, the only goal to speak of is to get longer to accumulate the total length you have grown and report it, let’s talk about that later. Yes indeedy, it’s the definition of a sandbox and simply screwing around is much more enjoyable than one would think. The sandbox has a variety of different toys and specks of sand within it that it gives a full variety of junk.

There are living beings, such a people, animals, animated objects and then there is scenery. What puts this all together is the physics engine and actual life the game gives, everything is interactive. The level design is simple but random, as in, every time you load up the game or load a new map, it’s going to be completely random. The maps are not enormous but it doesn’t disappoint either. It’s fun to see what you might get next on the next load out. Objects and people tend to interact with each other and not just you. I swear, I load up a new map and went to the bathroom to come back to the whole map in some sort of glorious chaos. Another thing is, if you want to sit back and chill, well the game takes over for you and controls Boy on its own after mere seconds of not playing.

“See! A glorified screensaver!”

So was the 3D Maze screensaver on windows 95/98 machines and yet I was so entertained as a child.

The game also sports some sort of mass online cooperation. When accumulating your stretchiness, you can report that length the Girl, some sort of same entity that likes to go to all the planets but needs your length to add to hers and thus reach her destination. Everyone who has this game contributes to that length and thus everyone helps reach the goal of reaching other planets. Recently, the moon was reached and everyone now has access to it, up next Mars. This means new planets to explore, though some may think they’re just recolored Earth maps, the new planets – or in this case the Moon – give new scenery and objects as well. So players who purchase the game later on might notice that they have access to planets that we all had fun working for.

There is also the message system and trophy system within the game, so if you have any friends, good for you. Overall the game is fun and heartwarming. I see it as a way to calm oneself like some Zen shit or a process to relieve stress. The game is all about experimentation so mileage may vary depending if your tank is full of imagination. So if you have a measly five bucks, go pick it up and together we’ll reach the heavens to slap that bastard child of a planet called Pluto (and maybe beyond).

Then Microsoft introduced Achievements and the whole thing went to hell in a hand basket.

There is no way I can go on the interwebz and even hint that the Achievement system may have problems without getting flamed, so I’ll go ahead and slip on my Nomex underwear while you follow the cut.

Years ago I played games for fun.  All my friends played games for fun.  All their friends played games for fun.  It was all we had in games.  If a game wasn’t fun what point was there to playing it?

Now, if you look around the Internet you will find several sites dedicated solely to the accumulation of Achievements and GamerScore.  Within these sites resides a new breed of gamer, the “Achievement Whore”.  Everybody has run across this little fellow.  He’s the one who plays constantly, chasing the next increase to his ePenis through GamerScore.  His entire self-worth as a gamer is tied up in a random number that nobody else cares about.  His GamerCard is full of games that offer easy 1000’s, but are usually not worthy of playing past the completion of the GamerScore acquisition.

I am familiar with this type of gamer, because for several weeks I was this gamer.  In late 2007 I started actively trying to increase my GamerScore.  Not a bad thing, in and of itself.  I realized I had crossed the line, however, as I sealed Avatar back up in the GameFly envelope.  Avatar is not really a good game, but has the singular distinction of being able to get the full 1000 points in less than 5 minutes (INCLUDING the intro cut scene).  I had crossed the line to become a gamer that played only for points, not for the game, and I wasn’t alone.  I know there are many people with this game on their cards.

Wait . . . what?  Are we so eager to pad our numbers that we are willing to play games we wouldn’t have thought twice about if they didn’t have Achievements?  Is this the message we want to send to developers and publishers?  Do we really want to reward them by buying and playing games with minimal entertainment value just because they pad our GamerScore easily?  Doing so means we will likely see an increase in these games filling the shelves.  Unfortunately, Avatar isn’t the only game out there guilty of this.  It’s just the most infamous.

Publishers know when a game is weak; they have been doing this long enough that they can tell if a game is likely to be a commercial success because it is good or because it simply has a good license.  Allowing them to pass off generic, poorly designed, poorly programmed games on us simply because they have easy points ensures that they will continue to do so.

This isn’t a problem with the Achievement system, but is really more of a problem with a certain type of player.  If you don’t mind half-assed games with a weak reward system, then by all means be that player.  If, however, you care about your games and want to reward quality, think about the real reason you may be going for those points.   Just remember when you are chasing those points that publishers are watching and taking notes on what you are willing to do to get them.  Don’t tell the publishers we will accept tripe in exchange for points.

Achievements are great, and there is nothing wrong with easy to obtain Achievements as long as the game is fun to play, and gives us a reason to play long enough to get our money’s worth as well.  We should think of Achievements as additional value for a game, as something that enhances the game play experience, not replaces it.

F.E.A.R. 2 starts out half an hour from where you finished in F.E.A.R. 1, so there is a great continuation in the storyline from another point of view. I personally admire the approach from a different angle, but it handicaps the story. The story in F.E.A.R. 2 is much like the first, in the way that it essential is the first. The whole storyline from F.E.A.R. 2 is essential F.E.A.R. 1 but without a backstory, and that really ticks me off. There isn’t much new content to low and behold.

Remember the creepy atmosphere in F.E.A.R? Well it’s half there. The game itself is creepy but only at some parts, like the elementary school. The elementary school is probably one of the strongest points in F.E.A.R. 2 because of the way Monolith designed it. When you enter the elementary school, the design is exactly like a school would be, and the creepiness stems from the fear of a place you knew to be safe, is no longer safe. Also, you have to admire that Monolith inserted some drawings Alma made and put them on a wall, it adds a really nice touch.

One of the things I really loved about F.E.A.R. was the dark atmosphere and the crisp sound effects that made you paranoid about every little detail. Does that still exist? I don’t think so. There are dark parts in F.E.A.R. 2 but the game itself is nowhere are dark and spooky as the first was. F.E.A.R. 2 prides itself in pop-up scares, while the original F.E.A.R. prides itself in a creepy environment.

F.E.A.R.  is first person shooter series, so let’s talk about gunplay. The good news: guns in F.E.A.R. 1 have been fully redesigned, and there have been more guns added. The bad news: All the interesting guns are gone. No more air missile gun, and you only get to use the particle cannon once in the game. I feel a bit ripped off. Not only the guns though, the enemy AI seems to have less personality. In F.E.A.R. 1, when you engaged enemies they’d be yelling things like “oh shit” and “fuck where did he go”. Instead we get some closed mouth push overs that seem to have no regard for each other. It’s a shame really.

So if so much has been taken away from F.E.A.R. 2, what has been gained? Well for one, the graphics. The graphics are amazing and surprising realistic, though a subject to grain filters and a bit of bluring, F.E.A.R. 2 still presents itself extremely well. Secondly, F.E.A.R. 2 has gained mech battles, and I wish I was making this up. There are parts in the campaign that have you entering mechanical suits to destroy your foes. The experience is awesome, even if it doesn’t fit in with the general F.E.A.R. understanding. Thirdly, we have a better cast of secondary characters, because unlike F.E.A.R, your teammates actual have a personality and are worth something. Lastly, the ending. The ending of F.E.A.R. 2 is unexpected and somewhat unique, and all I can say without ruining the ending is that F.E.A.R. 3 will be very, very interesting.

Bottom line? F.E.A.R. 2 is a great game, but it’s more generic than F.E.A.R. 1 was. You have less horror undertones and more action. The story isn’t very well drawn out, and you get ripped off a bit on the gun variety, but all-in-all the game presents itself with many redeeming features.

2009 is the year, and we’ve got teams all over the bloody shop. MeetYourMakers, Fnatic, Complexity 20ID, Salvo, Dignitas, 4K, Reason and the list trails off into the ether with some successful.. and some less successful pro gaming teams. What does this mean? Does this mean professional gaming is now viable as a career? Can you earn money for headshots in todays world? Will I ever stop name dropping? How many commas can I write before you close this tab? Hit the jump to find out.

As with any story, you have to start at the beginning. The problem with this is, the beginning is a much debated topic. Some would claim it began around 1997 with the birth of leagues such as the much praised Cyberathlete Professional League (CPL). Some would also claim it died in 2007 when the CPL could truck no more. Alot of others would say ‘On my campus we invented pro gaming, we had Quake II Lan parties every week and gave out prizes!’ Thankfully, this is my article. So I’m going to tell you when it started. 1990. I’m aware prior to that numerous events were held, such as the 1987 Video Games Masters tournament, but I don’t care. Because in 1990, Nintendo held the World Championships.

Contrary to the title, the Nintendo World Championships were not actually World Championships. The Nintendo US Championship Tour would be a more fitting name, but I digress. There were age brackets from 11 and under, 12 to 17 and 18+. And if you’ve been into gaming for some time, you’ll certainly know of the famous gold cartridges Nintendo gave out as prizes, which fetch ridiculously high prices now on eBay.

1990 through 1997 was nothing serious. A few local arcade tournaments in the US, Blockbuster did their thing with a few gaming championships through the early 1990’s, but it is in 1997 when the internet exploded. This was the beginning of professional gaming. (The birth and the beginning are two different things my child. Think about it.)

A tournament by the name of Red Annihilation was held, the game was Quake, the host was Micheal Shearon and the prize.. the prize was John Carmack’s very own Ferarri 328 GTS Cabriolet. And the winner? Thresh (Dennis Fong). Some of you may have heard of him, most of you haven’t. Thresh went on to win tournament after tournament, prize after prize and has now co-founded Xfire (which got purchased by Viacom for some $102 million) and is now worth millions of dollars.

Also in 1997, a man named Angel Munoz invented the CPL, hosting Quake II to Quake III and many other tournament focused games. As with any great idea, there were always imitators. The turn of the millenium rolled around and the first World Cyber Games was hosted in Korea, Quake III, Starcraft, Age of Empires II and FIFA 2000 were the games. 174 hopefuls entered to win a part of the total prize share of $20,000 (for comparison, by 2006 the WCG’s total prize fund was $462,000.) And by 2003 the Electronic Sports World Cup began, with 358 participants from 37 different countries entering. The prize fund here was no small feat at €150,000. The ESWC also was the first league to have a game specifically created for it, Trackmania Nations.

In 2006, professional gaming went mainstream. MLG was invented and brought the fight to the consoles, also being the first televised tournament for any league, with Halo 2 being splashed across TV screens nationwide. This year also saw the birth of a CPL spin-off, the World Series of Video Games, which gave host to big names such as the oft-heard Fatal1ty, FoV, Grubby and Team 3D. Times were good, there was money to be had if you had the skill to compete, the fresh blood had never stopped flowing, teams fought hard and shook hands, but times were not to be all smooth sailing.

From 2006 to now, the CPL has managed to die to be succeeded by its sister league, the CAL (Cyberathlete Amateur League). The Championship Gaming Series was invented, and also managed to die, Halo 3 went massive on the console scene and the PC scene has splintered into the best of the best, and the smaller leagues like TWL.

Today, there are literally thousands of teams from every country with decent internet. Only the top 10% of those teams play regularly in leagues, and only the top 4% of those teams manage to find regular sponsorship. It’s not a good idea to go out and say ‘I want to be a pro gamer’ just as in 2004 it was not a good idea to go out and say ‘I want to be a game designer’. But perhaps, in the coming years we will see the rebirth of the CPL and the rise and rise of tournament gaming.

So no, teabagging your friend after he dies and proclaiming ‘pwnt*’ as many times as you can does not make you a professional gamer. A pro is judged by the amount of sponsors he has, the level of sportsmanship he represents and first and foremost, his skill at the game. And go forth, with this knowledge, pick up your keyboards/pads and proceed to get your ass whooped in COD4 some more.

*Fun fact, did you know pwnt is just a mispelling of ownt? Look at your keyboard. See how the O and P are close together?